Because of subway service changes, I had to take 4 trains to Astoria today. And since the trains took longer than usual, I missed my 12:40am bus and walked 27 blocks home. Thank god Rann dropped off the magic insoles he scored for me today. Otherwise, I don't know how I could have ever managed! Yes!
The entire walk home, I was not sad or pissed at having to take another two hour trip home. The funny thing was that I felt so happy. I was so happy to be alive! It sounds cuckoo but its true! I'm exhausted as f*ck but that was the beauty of it. I'm alive and struggling and living life! Despite the exhaustion and all the other sh1t I'm going through, I know, deep in my gut that it will all pay off. I just know it. Things wouldn't be so damn hard if something mind-blowingly fabulous wasn't up ahead. No one can ever say that I lived such a grand life. It's hard. So VERY hard.
I was in such a weird high on my walk home that I kind of wanted to, dare I say it, CHANT! Hahahaha! (somewhere in Brooklyn, a buddhist is laughing) I dunno, I was talking to Ging about it the other day. When Rann took me to SGI last Sunday, I felt odd. But odd in a good way. I've always been partial to Buddhism, out of all the other religions I've read about. But I've never wanted to practice anything for real. I've considered myself somewhat of an agnostic for years now, much to the dismay of my very catholic mother. As quoted from their website "This Buddhist practice leads to empowerment and inner transformation or 'human revolution' which enables individuals to take responsibility for their lives and contribute to building a world where people of diverse cultures and faiths can live in peace." If you think about it, it's not really a religion as how Filipinos view it. I've come to see it as a lifestyle, or a way to help you grab your own life by the nuts and steer it towards the direction you want it to go. As I was watching everyone around me chant around me last Sunday, I almost felt a twinge of jealousy. Here was a group of people who gather together and help each other be the best version of themselves and live their life according to how they want it, without having to offer their lives up to some other higher power. It was so empowering and ridiculously scary.
Rann, I know why you took me there last Sunday, and I have to admit I left the center a bit skeptical. I left there thinking that if I were ever to join you guys, it will take a lot of reflection on my part whether or not I really, really want to do this, just as my decision to remain in New York had to come from me and not through the influence of other people. Hinay hinay muna ako. You keep making me ride the express trains in life. I'd like to make sure I'm going the way I want to go first before I hop on. I just though it would please you to know that I am considering it.
Well enough of all that nonsense, I must have bored most of you readers by now. Check out the two videos below. The first one was a link sent to me by Christian, who managed to find a bit of time in his very cramped up work schedule to watch it (HAH!) The second is the video Rann and Jordan were trying to make me watch last weekend but I was too drunk to understand any of it. I was already seeing double at the time. They're both stand up acts by Robin Williams. Enjoy!
The entire walk home, I was not sad or pissed at having to take another two hour trip home. The funny thing was that I felt so happy. I was so happy to be alive! It sounds cuckoo but its true! I'm exhausted as f*ck but that was the beauty of it. I'm alive and struggling and living life! Despite the exhaustion and all the other sh1t I'm going through, I know, deep in my gut that it will all pay off. I just know it. Things wouldn't be so damn hard if something mind-blowingly fabulous wasn't up ahead. No one can ever say that I lived such a grand life. It's hard. So VERY hard.
I was in such a weird high on my walk home that I kind of wanted to, dare I say it, CHANT! Hahahaha! (somewhere in Brooklyn, a buddhist is laughing) I dunno, I was talking to Ging about it the other day. When Rann took me to SGI last Sunday, I felt odd. But odd in a good way. I've always been partial to Buddhism, out of all the other religions I've read about. But I've never wanted to practice anything for real. I've considered myself somewhat of an agnostic for years now, much to the dismay of my very catholic mother. As quoted from their website "This Buddhist practice leads to empowerment and inner transformation or 'human revolution' which enables individuals to take responsibility for their lives and contribute to building a world where people of diverse cultures and faiths can live in peace." If you think about it, it's not really a religion as how Filipinos view it. I've come to see it as a lifestyle, or a way to help you grab your own life by the nuts and steer it towards the direction you want it to go. As I was watching everyone around me chant around me last Sunday, I almost felt a twinge of jealousy. Here was a group of people who gather together and help each other be the best version of themselves and live their life according to how they want it, without having to offer their lives up to some other higher power. It was so empowering and ridiculously scary.
Rann, I know why you took me there last Sunday, and I have to admit I left the center a bit skeptical. I left there thinking that if I were ever to join you guys, it will take a lot of reflection on my part whether or not I really, really want to do this, just as my decision to remain in New York had to come from me and not through the influence of other people. Hinay hinay muna ako. You keep making me ride the express trains in life. I'd like to make sure I'm going the way I want to go first before I hop on. I just though it would please you to know that I am considering it.
Well enough of all that nonsense, I must have bored most of you readers by now. Check out the two videos below. The first one was a link sent to me by Christian, who managed to find a bit of time in his very cramped up work schedule to watch it (HAH!) The second is the video Rann and Jordan were trying to make me watch last weekend but I was too drunk to understand any of it. I was already seeing double at the time. They're both stand up acts by Robin Williams. Enjoy!
Btw, yesterday was the first time I had to work without Paul's help! I came in to work and found out he was on his day off! I was left the whole day with the new guy Brian who, even after being there for 3 days, still couldn't do much! I panicked! Good thing I managed alright and was semi pleased I had Brian to do all the dirty work like clean up and set tables. I didn't screw up anyone's orders for lunch or dinner and received the better percentage of the tips. The entire dinner rush, I was silently wishing we wouldn't get any large groups of 5 or higher. Thank gawd we didn't. We did have a busy night but I finished just fine! Kenny had a big smile for me during my dinner break and was quick to comment that I had caught on quite fast for someone who had no restaurant experience.
I did get one annoying customer today and I got a bit of scolding from Ben for a minor little screw up but everything is fine. I'm trying to collect my tips now so I can work up enough cash to find an apartment by next month. Hoohah!
I did get one annoying customer today and I got a bit of scolding from Ben for a minor little screw up but everything is fine. I'm trying to collect my tips now so I can work up enough cash to find an apartment by next month. Hoohah!
matagal ka nang nagchachant.. puro negative lang. now at least positive na