Feeling the Burn

I haven't been to the gym since 2002. I've just started again last Wednesday. Niki and I joined the same gym Paul S. goes to in Pilar. It's definitely no Fitness First but it pretty much does the same thing.

I force myself to wake up early now to go before work. My thighs are stiff and it hurts to laugh and I'm rediscovering muscles I didn't know I had. I don't know if it's going to make any difference but I sure do like the feeling that I'm doing something about my health. If anything, I'm doing this for that. I'm not very self conscious about my weight. I never weigh myself. I always say for as long as I'm fairly satisfied with the way I look and my clothes still fit, I'm still good. But since (my) Paul's visit in November and I saw how (uncomfortably) scrawny he looked, I felt ashamed standing beside him. I look like his mother for god's sake. I have no desire to be just as scrawny as he is. In fact, I plan to fatten him back up when I get back. He don't look healthy no mo' and I feel like I'm going to break him every time I gave him a hug. Don't worry babe, I'm not going to make you so fat, you just can't continue looking the way you do, you don't look like my husband anymore it's freaking me out. I just need to insert a bit more meat under that skin.

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